When it comes to expressing pleasure during intimate moments, you might picture scenes from romantic movies like "When Harry Met Sally" or recall awkward situations where friends playfully embarrassed you during a phone call with your mom. Moaning during sexual activity can be a potent element in the bedroom.
A single breathless sigh or a deep, primal groan often serves as an unspoken indicator that everything is going exceptionally well. In fact, releasing these passionate sounds can even be linked to a more fulfilling sex life, as suggested by a study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships in 2012.
Nevertheless, if you've never incorporated moans into your intimate experiences, it can be a bit daunting. Nobody wants to come across as if they're imitating an uninterested adult film star.
For some individuals, especially those sharing living spaces with others, the idea of moaning during sex might trigger cringe-worthy discomfort. But don't worry; a couple of sex experts are here to guide you through the process of embracing the passionate side of vocalizing your pleasure, and who knows, you might find yourself experimenting with those vocal cords sooner than you expect.
Why do people express pleasure vocally during sex? It's quite straightforward: moans are an indication that you're aroused. Women use moans during sex to communicate their enjoyment to their partners. It's like a gentle nudge in the right direction, a gratifying response to your partner's efforts. And let's face it, it often occurs involuntarily due to the physical intensity of the experience. People don't compare moans during sex to tennis grunts for no reason.
However, it's important to note that people may also moan when they're uncomfortable or disinterested. You shouldn't expect your partner to decipher whether your moans convey pain or pleasure. If something doesn't feel right or isn't enjoyable, it's best to use words to communicate your needs and preferences, according to Laurie Mintz, PhD, the author.
How can moans enhance the pleasure of sex? Research suggests that the deeper you are immersed in the sexual experience, the more liberated your vocalizations may become. Your own moans can contribute to enhancing your arousal.
The most enjoyable sex experiences are liberating, and letting out moans when the desire strikes can help you shed inhibitions and fully immerse yourself in pleasure. In fact, a few "oohs" can even intensify your climax. When a woman moans during sex, her throat relaxes, her breathing slows down, and her pelvic floor muscles loosen. This, according to experts, can lead to a mind-blowing orgasm.
Is moaning a mandatory part of sex? Absolutely not. If moaning doesn't align with your preferences, that's perfectly fine. Some people prefer silence during sex, and that's completely valid, says Mintz. Noise can be a turn-on for some and a distraction for others. Sometimes, a passionate moan or even a scream can enhance the mood, while other times, quiet enjoyment is preferred. The key is to do what feels right for you.
How do I start moaning if I want to give it a try? To ease into this aspect of sexual expression, Mintz recommends trying it on your own. Skip the research from adult entertainment and experiment during solo experiences. The next time you masturbate, allow yourself to moan. Begin by taking deep breaths from your belly and releasing them slowly with a sigh punctuating each breath. See if it enhances your experience. If it feels good, consider incorporating it when you're with a partner.
If you're uncertain, discussing it with your partner beforehand can be a fun way to introduce the idea. You can say something like, "Let's talk about the sounds we make during sex" or "I've heard that making more noise can be a turn-on, and I'm interested in trying it." It can be enjoyable for both you and your partner, creating a win-win situation.
Is there a right way to moan? Don't overthink it. According to Mintz, if you're worrying about the quality or volume of your moans, you're likely not enhancing your arousal. In the realm of sexual expression, there's rarely a one-size-fits-all approach. The key is to let go of self-criticism, take a deep breath, embrace the moment, and let your body and voice follow their natural course.
I'm already an experienced moaner. How can I make my moans even sexier? Any sound that naturally emerges is bound to heighten the arousal for both you and your partner. If you want to fine-tune it, consider "using your breath as the lead in your moaning," suggests an expert. On the exhale, allow your voice to come out gradually. Focus on sending your breath and your moans toward your pelvis. It may feel akin to a meditative exercise or tantric sex. When in doubt, simply let yourself be. The deeper you are in the sexual experience, the more uninhibited your vocalizations will become.
Should I ever fake a moan to simulate an orgasm? Faking an orgasm is not advisable. Even if you've done it in the past, it won't benefit your sex life. Moans can serve as positive reinforcement and boost your partner's confidence, but faking it sends mixed signals.
"Faking it teaches our partners to do exactly what doesn't work for us," warns Mintz. Being on the same page sexually with your partner is something worth celebrating.